There is a popular story that makes its way around most cafeterias in Asmara when the issue of "Beles" is discussed. [Beles is a name given by Asmarinos to young Eritreans who come to visit Eritrea every summer.]  A certain Eritrean from the Diaspora, when asked how she felt about the situation in her homeland, had said something to this effect: "Ane nihagerey keyede tese-wie kimetsi yideliy iye."  [I would like to go die for my country, and come back.]

Probably, she did not understand what she was saying; or even the weight of the words she was uttering. On the other hand, she may even had no idea of what she was talking about. Or simply, her Tigrigna was bad.

In any case, I am not trying to make fun out of what she said; i.e. if she had said it anyway. I am just trying to give you an insight in to how our – the ones in Eritrea and in the Diaspora – ways of thinking are different.

Broken Dreams

There are good and bad dreamers. Some are so good at it; they even have a small isle, where they would often slip away into to escape from their daily lives. There, they defy all rules of individual certainty and reverie about things and the way they want them to be.

On the other hand, there are those that suck at dreaming. Many of these people do not dream anymore. And if, by some miracle, they do, they end up having nightmares.

Now, I am not going to talk about dreams and the metaphysics of fantasies. That is beyond my scope. But I will talk about the dreams of many young Eritreans and may be the dreams of Martin Luther King.

To begin with, Dr. King was one of the greatest dreamers. Did he live to see his dreams come true, is another issue. But at least he had the space to dream and declare his dream. The youth in Eritrea have neither. If they dream, they end up having a nightmare. And if somehow they find a way around the nightmare, they can not substantiate their dreams. The state bars them from doing both.

Fortunately, for me, I am a recent escapee from that world – a hadami, if you prefer to call me that. So I am allowed to dream these days.  However, I do not know which category I fall in to – bad or good dreamer. Yet, I too am a dreamer. Or at least I was growing up as a child. In fact, I had many dreams. Dreams like one day I will become a doctor, cure people, support myself, and support others, and so on.

Regrettably, my dreams barely came true. Almost three decades after I started dreaming about being independent, I am only semi-independent, if you know what I mean. Not only that, but I wouldn't mind getting help from those same parents who helped me dream back then, even though they are old and need my help now. I still get that occasional booster – nay shahi.

Of course, I am hoping that reality is going to change for me sometime soon, mainly because I get paid in US currency now. However, I cannot deny that that was my reality until I left Eritrea about a year ago. Yet, the most deplorable thing about the whole situation is that the youth in Eritrea shared the same reality as mine, and even worse, they do not have the slightest idea when that reality is going to change for them.

Shattered Dreams

I do not think we need a social scientist to explain that dreaming is never enough, unless it is followed by something tangible. Even our neighbor Adey Lemlem knows that. And the only degree she has is graduating to arranged marriage at the age of 16. I am sure she would give me a well-articulated explanation of how dreams mean nothing if you do not somehow manage to change them into certainty. Then, she would close her argument by saying "ezi wedey" and may be even, if I sit close enough, a tap on my shoulder.

As we did not require a social scientist to explain the necessity of changing dreams to reality, I do not think that we need one to ascertain that the "formative years" – adolescence years – of a person are the determinant ages of their future as well. Do you agree? Then that is settled too.

What is unsettling, however, is that in Eritrea, these formative years are literally wasted under the pretext of National service. The youth are made to spend most of their productive time sitting idle in places so far away from 'civilization' and so far away from productivity.

Here, one may argue, completing one's national service is a noble thing to do. I could not agree more. Hence, no one should complain about it. In fact, since the inexistent constitution makes it compulsory, no one should run away from it as well. However, one should not forget that national service is by no means free service . Moreover, as it is required by the same constitution, one must be allowed to exercise one's constitutional rights, the least of all freedom of movement, upon completion of one's national service. All arguments otherwise are unfounded and pointless. To say the youth should sit tight and take it all with no complaints at some time, and start naming them defeatists the minute they stand against the abject status-quo, is simply cruel and extremely biased.

I am not going to argue that the youth in Eritrea are living a dream life, for they are not. I do not intend to engage myself in trying to prove or disprove that argument as well. I think it is futile. Everyone knows the truth. Even Sofia T. Mariam knows that. But it is like what they say: endafeleTe zxememes…[if you choose to be deaf…]

The Dream Snatchers

What is it with those people anyway, people like Sofia I mean? Do they think they are smarter than everybody else? Or is it mere arrogance and sheer contempt for the intelligence of their compatriots?

Either way, what they are doing is a catastrophe, an addition to the more devastating tragedy that is driving the Eritrean youth in to exile: The PFDJ Syndrome.

Speaking of people married to the PFDJ syndrome, I always get irate when I hear them, especially the young ones from the Diaspora, say that they are grateful of what their equals at home are doing; but then start blaming everyone who is in Eritrea the minute their equals at home start saying something against the government. Some even go to the extent of calling Eritreans at home by the names the government uses, like defeatists, temberkekti, Weyanes and so on.

Equally, many Eritreans from the Diaspora express their wish and desire to come to Eritrea and serve their country. What they do not understand is the adversity of serving the country. Do not dare misquote me; I am not saying one should not go through any hardship to serve her/his country. Instead, I am saying many do not understand the hardship that is involved in the process and they boast before hand. (“ane nihagerey teswie kmles yideli iye”) Moreover, when the real thing comes, they crack like there is a big seismic activity taking place inside them. Some even hurry back to where ever they come from.

I do not want to make this article entirely about the Eritrean Diaspora. Yet, I cannot fail to notice the vital role the Eritrean Diaspora plays in the bigger equation of mending shattered dreams. It is important to note that some Eritreans from the Diaspora are as much responsible as those in power in Asmara for the shattered dreams of many young Eritreans. The irony is these same people also hold the keys to mending the shattered dreams of those same young Eritreans.

These people, after brief visits to Eritrea, speak of the wonderful job the Agelgilot are doing. However, they never talk about the dreams of those Agelgilot. They barely mention that some of those Agelgilot have been in the trenches for 10 years now. They never talk about the sad stories of all those Agelgilot. They do not mention the wife of the martyr, who went to mimihidar to plead for help to feed her children, but who was told instead to go to the front to bring papers confirming her husband was killed 'ab ginbar'. They do not argue that these courageous Eritreans deserve the best the government can offer for their bravery. They do not even acknowledge the hard work of these young Eritreans. As far as they are concerned, the reason why the youth in Eritrea opt to flee from the country is a result of a higher conspiracy.

I say, to these people, the reason the young are fleeing Eritrea is a direct consequence of your intentional ignorance of the truth; your refusal to come to terms with reality.  Please stop stealing their dreams.

Mending Shattered Dreams

I have a proposal for the Eritrean Diaspora: Rise!

Realize the enemy is not the young Eritreans who are running away. It is the regime in power that is responsible for crushing their dreams. Can you not see? Everything has changed. The peace and tranquility we had, both in the streets of Asmara and in every Eritrean's mind, are gone. That was probably because we were at war: a seemingly perfect explanation.  However, it was not the actual war that took our peace hostage; it was what followed the war.

Many things that we never thought would exist in a free, independent Eritrea were brought out to light: Gifa, forceful conscription; rape in the military camps; corruption in all government offices and in the military; mass arrests of people who opposed the government or even dared to say something negative about any government policy, being marked as temberkekti, Esubat and so on; closure of all private media and subsequent unjust detention of all their journalists; the arrest of the University of Asmara Students' Union president and the consequent detention of about 4000 university students in a very inhospitable and one of the hottest places on earth; incorporating education with military training forcing underage children to go to Sawa with no parental guidance; ultimately destroying the education system in Eritrea; closure of the only university in the country.

Should I go on? What more should happen to convince you otherwise?

I have another proposal: how about a joint fund for all the Eritreans suffering in prisons and on the streets in neighboring countries, in North Africa, and in Europe. How about a concerted effort to free the Eritreans rotting in prisons in countries like Libya? How about a combined attempt to try to solve the problem from its source?

How about that? How about mending the shattered dreams of every young Eritrean for once and for all?